Raindrops on Roses

 Dress, £7 H&M

Shirt, £5 Primark

Clutch, £6 Primark

I got a fringe this week, I don't know how I feel about it really, I think i just need to get used to it. I have so much university work to do, I should really be doing that and not taking photos of myself but I put this outfit together and I really like it. All I've bought recently is pastel green things. I really need to stop shopping altogether because I need to save up for next year but I keep making cheeky little purchases here and there and not realising how much I'm spending. I'm going to be looking at my bank statement through my fingers at the end of this month I'm sure. 

quarter life crisis

I said I wasnt going to blog again until school was over and I stuck to it, but now im back. I am officially out of education. Prom was on the 28th of June and the following morning I was on a flight to Tenerife. 

A week away made me literally rethink everything that is going on in my life. I've basically been in the same place for 18years straight and when I actually took myself away from London, away from everything it made me realise how many things I've got wrong about living life. I met some really nice people in Tenerife and most of them are from the North of England; I'd been writing off looking at Leeds uni because I was too scared to leave London and now I literally cant wait to go and visit it in September.

Anyway its taken me almost a week since my return to write this up, not because ive been busy, the contrary infact, ive been doing a whole lot of nothing. Sitting, sleeping, crying because of my post holiday blues, tweeting, sleeping some more, occasionally nibbling on something from my fridge... i even made it to the pub one night.. I have work tomorrow for the first time in three weeks and as much as that depresses me it will be good to talk to some actual people, and have a reason to get out of my bed. 

My mum is encouraging me to book another holiday and its something I might do, next year I hope I work a season out in a hot country or something. I dont know, there are a lot of thoughts going on right now, but they're quite often fuelled by frustration and boredom. My summer is wasting away I need to cheer up. 

Anyone from the north want to have me stay at your house for a week? I miss hearing mint and mega said proper like....

Photo is of me in all my slightly tanned glory, you can see one tan line, that's enough to prove my holiday happened. Hope all your summers are beginning well. Love as always Celia xx

Tracy Emin ‘Love is What You Want’ Exhibition

 Emin’s outrageous reputation and fiery public persona means she needs no introduction. Fourteen years after the Sensation exhibition her largest retrospective is taking place. With pre-booked tickets and a buzz of public excitement surrounding the event it is obvious whether you love her or you hate her Love is What You Want is an exhibition not to be missed.

^{Knowing My Enemy took centre stage in room one of Emin’s solo exhibition at London's Hayward Gallery, a partially collapsed pier made of recycled wood that still held the smell of its life before art. Accompanying this work in room one were the blankets that are only too recognisable as Emin’s creations. Hung one above the other on the wall I found myself negotiating my way under the rickety pier to read the highest placed works which added to the impact of them, as they, like the issues they addressed, seemed so much bigger than myself. Visible individual stitches and floral fabrics combined with the hand written patches make the juxtaposition of the construction and the message so significantly more prominent than I have ever felt it to be from viewing the work photographed.}

^{The feeling of being overwhelmed by Emin’s work continued as I viewed her neon creations; displayed in a darkened corridor they initially create the feeling of a seedy alley in Soho. If you’ve never experienced Emin’s work before the self-centeredness of it will have become obvious by this point, further reinforced by the films in the rooms that followed.}

^{People stood uncomfortably in the darkened room watching one of Emin’s earliest films, Why I Never Became a Dancer. Her voiceover was frank, with a bitter tone which contrasted with the glitzy clips of Margate seafront and a glittering ocean. ‘Shane, Eddie, Tony, Doug, Richard… this one's for you’ Emin says as a clip of her dancing, spinning and shimmying to You Make Me Feel by Sylvester begins to roll, sticking a metaphorical middle finger up at the boys who had jeered and shouted ‘SLAG!’ at her in the British Disco Dance Championship in 1978. It was after this film that the sense of how brave Emin is as an individual echoed through me.}

^{Emotional suicide; the reason for the charred texts and paintings in glass cabinets, and with it the first reference to the alliance with Sarah Lucas. The melodrama of this exhibition seemed to flat line but it was not detrimental; the ‘fun’ artwork had been seen and now tiny self portraits of her in the most stricken times in her life evoke compassion. Stale tampons may push people to question her artistic merit but this retrospective shows Emin to be notably un-phased by these views including works such as I've Got It All; a photograph depicting her pulling money to her crotch, a blatant and shameless statement to all critics.}

^{She is quite right to celebrate; Emin is one of, if not the most successful British female artist ever and so if you can forgive the narcissism Love is What You Want is a brilliant chance to view some of Emin’s greatest works.}